Tag Archives: nhs

Band 5 Bullshitter Update

Since I started spreading the term around a little I have been asked by quite a few people if I am setting up either a band 5 bullshitter discussion forum, name and shame board or band 5 bullshitter ratings board on this site.

The answer is no. Even though I am retired I simply don’t have the time to develop and administer such a thing either on this site or on any other. Any website needs regular administration and maintennance and those based on CMS’ platforms need maintennace on a more regular basis which I cannot commit to.

I am in favour of a ratings board or name and shame board or similar and I think it could be a good thing. The band 5 bullshitters could be ranked from minor bullshit through to cretinous and life-threatening.

If someone developed such an animal they will get an introduction blog written by me, a link in the blogroll/bogroll section and if it is totally anonymous I will add the 100 or so I have on a list in my desk file here.

Remember a band 5 bullshitter dosen’t just have to be a band 5 nurse. It could be any NHS employee from a toilet cleaner right up to a chief executive or chairman.

The Rise Of The Band 5 Bullshitter!

Band 5 bullshitter is a term first told to me by someone else who also had treatment at Harefield Hospital. It is used to describe a nurse that tells lies.

Bullshit is fairly self explanatory worldwide but some for non UK visitors, please allow me to explain the band 5 bit. Band 5 is the most common pay grade for nurses in the UK.

I personally now use the phrase for any member of NHS staff that tells lies whether or not they are a doctor, nurse, toilet cleaner or the chief executive.

Anyway less of the explanation and more of the celebration. I have managed to get this phrase into the hallowed Urban Dictionary and you can see more here.

This phrase though now applying to the whole of the NHS organisation will always have its roots at Harefield Hospital in Middlesex which is now part of the Guy’s and St Thomas’ NHS Trust.

Band 5 Bullshitter Merchandise Now Available

I am very pleased to be able to announce that as part of The Urban Dictionary platform that Band 5 Bullshitter merchandise is available.

This merchandise consists of mugs, t-shirts, sweatshirts and gaiters.

This is a US site and is priced in US Dollars. For people in the UK this might mean some tax is added to your order/

You can find the merchandise here.

Some pictures.

Doing A Crap Job

I have had to ask the same harsh question to people repeatedly recently. “Why haven’t you done your work properly?”

The responses have ranged from a blank denial that they haven’t done their job properly, combined with doing a runner when asked by me to prove it! You can’t prove something that hasn’t happened!

Other responses go into lies and very big ones! Clearly people in the workforce who have no idea of the truth and wouldn’t know the truth if it came up and spanked them on the arse with a bulldozer!

Doing a proper job is not difficult. You simply do as you are told. Telephone someone now means pick up the phone and make a call! Email me this that or the other means do exactly that! Go and urinate. Walk to the bathroom and take a pee! Make the coffee! – Who really does not know how to do that! Please enlighten me for the love of the baby Jesus and the Virgin Mary!

It seems to me that there is a massive issue in that employers are not employing people fit fotr their job roles and many are employing people to roles that are far too senior and unsuitable for them just because they gave the right bullshit in the interview room! This is damaging business. To add to this every public sector worker I have spoken too since the beginning of the year I could not trust if I employed them. Each one of them could not be trusted to go to the shop for a pint of milk with the right money and come back with the correct change! This is the public sector you and I pay their wages through our taxes. Do you really want people like this in your hospitals, local councils, police forces etc? There are so many examples of this in public service from the lowest level for example toilet cleaner right up to chief executive level and beyond.

I have come to the conclusion that university tuition fees are partly to blame because everyone seems to get a degree for their £27 or so thousand and not necessarily one that they have worked properly for. They have effectively bought it!

I must also take aim at English teachers at every level. For fucks sake teach the fucking kids to read properly. You start at the top of the document and read to the end. You do not pick and choose what to fucking read. Based on the standard of reading these days I do have to wonder how many English teachers paid a backhander to get the PGCE. I know of several schools whose English teachers need to be investigated for this!

I also think the public sector needs an investigation into the qualifications of some of its workers, in terms of fraudulent qualifications. Most seem to sleep through any courses they are put on and then try and blag it.

Tell me I am wrong but we have vast swathes of the workforce that are not bright enough to be in any post well maybe they could be a fence post concreted in the ground but that’s about it!

Soon this going to affect business hard. The UK is a trading stranger and we as country are not overly well endowed with employable talent as the above shows. Employers and senior managers need to wake and manage too. Stop over supporting your staff. Its not big and its not clever. The NHS is worth a clear shout as this is an organisation it’s almost impossible to get sacked from! Top tip at senior manager level and above. Sack staff sooner it is better for your business. The P45 is an excellent management tool.

To staff, do your work properly the first time round, stop fucking about and Facebooking your mates when you are supposed to be working and blaming others because you were too lazy. Follow the process you were taught and follow it properly. Oh and fraud in the workplace isn’t a clever thing either!

Guys And St Thomas’ NHS Trust – Media and Press Invitation From Court Guinness

If any accredited members of the media and press would like access to over 80 pages of faults and complaints regarding Guy’s and St Thomas NHS Trust and in particular their Harefield outpost this is now available. Please use the form below to contact me for an initial discussion.

Very basic outlines that only scratch the surface can be found elsewhere on this site.


    The NHS Business Services Authority

    The NHS Business Services Authority has a wide remit in England. They provide a number of services for the NHS inncluding prepay prescription cards. Being prescribed about 20 types of medication I have these prepay cards to save money.

    The NHS Business Services Authority have written to me to claim that I fraudulently used one of these cards to obtain prescription medication. Bad Move. I emailed them evidence, they stalled. They cannot provide evidence of this crime that they allege that I committed, Do you know why? Because I never committed this crime. They are trying to charge me a fine of £100 which I will not pay. In fact they now wrongly send 340,000 penalty notices accusing people of fraud every year. An example of this is here. That’s £34,000,000!

    I have held meetings with other victims and have spoken to other interested parties at length about the general attitude of the NHS Business Services Authority. I will share more of the out on these meetings another time.

    I know the NHS is strapped for cash but this to my own mind is fraudulently obtaining cash the other way round, which I strenuously object to. I have invoiced the NHS Business Services Authority for the waste of my time and will keep this post updated. I am considering suing the NHS Business Services Authority for Libel in view of their fraud accusation. I will update this post with further information.

    Network Blocking – NHS

    It is with regret that I have had to block access to this site and some other services to users of the NHS Network and associated networks, this due to unacceptable spikes which is preventing this and some other platforms from operating to their optimum performance. The traffic load to this site from the NHS network and associated networks is unacceptable to the smooth running of such a complex and well utilised platform. I apologise for any inconvenience this may cause